I've Got The Old Thing Down

I’ve seen my future, and it’s full of matinees and early bird specials. On Saturday, Chris and I went to a play at the Hale Theater. It was a very funny play, a British Farce and was well acted and well produced. While we were there, I couldn’t help but notice that the majority of the audience was over 50 years of age (probably over 60). This was not something that I had given any thought to when I had called in to reserve tickets for the six plays I would be seeing this year. But now, after thinking things over, I see that my actions have been extremely old lady-ish in this matter. I did ask for all matinees for my season tickets, thinking to leave my evenings free. Now while this made perfect young person sense at the time (I want to leave my evenings free for our Saturday Night dinner group), when we had discovered the age group of most of our fellow play goers, I couldn’t help but visualize myself in a Seinfeld episode, walking with his parents into a restaurant at 4:30 in the afternoon so that we can get the early bird special. Pretty soon, I’ll be happy that we reserved mostly matinee tickets to the plays, not because I want to be able to do other things at night, but because I want to be able to get home to bed. I’ll be that mean old lady who arrives 45 minutes late to the production with seats in the exact center of the row, expecting people to get up and out of my way because I need to sit down regardless of anyone around me (this happened to us on Saturday), telling all those youngsters that their music is too darn loud and that they should have more respect for their elders, and driving 35 miles per hour in a 50 mph zone (I shudder to think).